Perna- with my ears, they DO stick out, guaranteed. The reason people say they don't is because I hide them, my hair is always down, or my ears are covered with a headband. I go to great lengths to disguise them. When people debate it and I show them, they always say 'okay, yes they do'. One guy even started mocking me and told me to 'put them away'.
People have been critical of my features, my weight, my hair, my teeth. I feel like I have to fix them because I want to be good enough. I want ME to be happy with how I look. And I'm not.
Yes I DO care what they look like, even if people tell me 'looks don't matter'. Looks may not matter in general, there are a lot of people out there, including myself, who don't care what another person look like, but society draws attention to attractiveness. I'm not oblivious to how I must sound. And I do not care about what others look like, only when I am comparing MYSELF to them.

Fool Zero- I know a lot of people probably think I am lying about myself, that is one of the very reasons I feel uncomfortable with talking about it. I don't want to sound like I'm looking for people tell me otherwise. Every time I bring it up people try and tell me otherwise. Do I believe them? Not for even a second. I do not know how people cannot see what I see. And I know that as soon as I start talking about it on here the first thing people do- go straight to my profile to take a look. I just deleted an entire album because I freaked out.
One of the pictures that was on there was my profile picture on MSN (I hate MSN, but I can't help myself really!). One of my friends commented that it was a nice picture, and I said it really wasn't, I said it looks okay because it's just a small picture in the corner. He asked me to put it up as a bigger picture so he could see for himself, and, literally, I started stressing. I actually got nervous and restless couldn't put it up. Then I came here and deleted the album with that picture on it.
It sounds ridiculous I know. Other times I can share pictures fine, Ive shared a lot of pictures with him. But when he actually wanted to specifically see what I looked like in a photo, I panicked.

This is so hard for me to talk about so that others understand what I feel and see.
Every day I am noticing new flaws. The other day I was looking in the mirror and thought my nose looked fat, it was almost like it just grew fat while I was looking at it. It's like they become magnified, which I guess is partly what it is, what I see is magnified in my eyes because I spend so long looking. I have spend ages tonight on my bed with a mirror staring at my face. I noticed the other day also that my mouth is crooked when I smile, I've never noticed that before.

Someone said to me earlier tonight that I am beautiful on the inside (you know I could barely even write that sentence). Do I feel that way about myself. No. Not at all. I dislike myself on the inside as much as I do on the outside. I guess you could say I find myself disgusting as a person. And I mean that literally.

I'm starting to think I shouldn't really talk about it anymore, yall are just going to be talking to a brick wall trying to convince me otherwise. I just don't know what to say, or how to explain it.