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Old Jul 06, 2010, 04:27 PM
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rkba97 rkba97 is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2009
Location: Somewhere on the east coast of the US
Posts: 69
Kind of a long story here, but I feel the need to get this out...

The day I went to college (at age 16) I had my first sip of alcohol, and many nights since then have been a blur. I'd been pretty much a nerd who kept to myself, but college changed that overnight. (Typical story? Probably...) Most of it has been a lot of fun, though, and I say that even after what happened recently. 2 weeks ago I passed out from not eating dinner and drinking too much beer. I haven't had a sip of alcohol since then. Somehow it really struck me this time that I am slowly killing myself with alcohol... may have to do with the fact that my fiance was right there when it happened, and it scared him a lot. Not to mention the fact that mood stabilizers and antidepressants tend to be not very effective when consumed along with alcohol. Anyway I think another thing that helped was to realize that at an engagement party a few weeks ago (in our honor), my brother and I wound up staying up til way after sunrise, and we talked for hours and hours, and neither of us can remember anything that was said. Such an awesome night and I don't remember a thing.

So maybe that indirectly, but as a direct result of passing out and almost breaking my head open on the gravel driveway of a friend-of-a-friend's house I'd never been to before, I've stopped drinking and so far it's been a breeze (although I'm sure there are difficult times ahead). There have been get-togethers since then, and even on July 4th I stayed sober and just watched everybody else get wasted. They acted like a bunch of fools and it was hilarious to me. Why haven't I realized it's just as much fun to not drink?....

I know it won't always be this easy so I am really loving this right now.

I guess this wound up being just a dissertation, and not really a question or plea for advice. I guess when it gets difficult to refrain from drinking.... that's when I'll be asking for support.

I should mention that that philosophy of mine is something my therapist is trying to show me is so counterproductive - saying that it's inevitable that I'll want to drink again. Well, I hope this time I'll be strong enough to not drink again, even when I want to. Turns out life is pretty great (and less expensive) without the alcohol.

Thanks for letting me share
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