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**Trigger for those who feel or felt bullied**
I used to get bullied at school they used to follow me home and rip my school bag off my shoulder; I was bullied by my brother he physically abused me terribly which I suppose was where my "bully me" badge got tattooed on my forehead or something....
Not really sure what happened today but I stood up to a bully ..I was sad for a little while, I got upset because I had not ever said or wrote a single word to this person who decided it was her place to bail me up and bully me on someone elses behalf.
I felt lost and sad...at first then I felt tired; then it clicked what had been bothering me so much about chat, about leaving the house, what some of my anxiety is about...being bullied pushed around by an ignorant who has no purpose other than to make others feel less than they are or less than they should feel when they are misread or misunderstood...and I know most people have been misread or misunderstood. Someone elses words, very simple words made it all fall into place...one single sentence!
Then I got mad, I got really mad but what does someone who has been bullied most of their life do when they get mad? I cried but that didn't fulfill or satiate the anger. I'm not a trinket thrower or tanty tosser...I've never let it out before; it felt like being naked when someone knocks at the door and in order to get a robe you have to run past the open window..."Oooh oooh what do I do now?" hop back to the laundry and peg 10 teatowels together then peg them to my ears...
Typical I avoid the issue by changing the topic and hopefully make myself laugh by thinking something silly...
The last time I tried to stand up for myself I was told off and when i tried to explain it I got ignored which was in one way worse than being buillied because it proved to me that bullying is ok as long as I am the victim...stand up to it and I'm slapped right back into my place...
So what do I do now? do I place myself in the path of another telling off? What would happen to me this time? Then I thought "NO! Not any more!" So I told them off It was short and sweet and refreshing!
I now know why I've taken the courses of study that I have; to be a psychologist and work with bullies, whether they be kids or adults.
This I think I need to think about...the very thought scares me...have to fix that if I am going to face up to these people
What do you feel about this topic I've always known I hated bullies but I never thought as an adult that bullying was an issue...but of course it is DUH!
Rhia
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Peace, the deep imperturbable peace is right there within you, quieten the mind and slow the heart and breathe...breathe in the perfume of the peace rose and allow it to spread throughout your mind body and senses...it can only benefit you and those you care about...I care about you
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