Quote:
Originally Posted by Ygrec23
Melbadze: That "Law of the Garbage Truck" is GREAT! I wish there were somewhere here where you could save favorite posts, because I'd save your post there forever.
Rhia: I think bullying is always an issue, regardless of age, though it does diminish as you grow older. But it pops up at odd times, even for older folks. You really can turn around and walk away when someone tries. Or simply stare them in the eyes while they're bullying, wait til they're finished, say nothing and walk away. That disconcerts them. Or of course as you know you can jump right in and interrupt them screaming at them at the top of your voice, not letting them get a word in. That really disconcerts them. But it take so-o-o much energy! Personally, I'm too old to have that energy, but you can do it at yours.
The best of luck to you both!
Take care!  |
Dearest Ygrec
I think I'm too old for confrontation, I've avoided it all my life but it finds me. My first bullying epsidoe was with my brother I was a few weeks old and very sick with pneumonia so I cried a lot my mother thought it was amusing because my brother at age 2.5yrs dragged a chair to my basinette climbed onto it and put his hands around my throat and stared to squeeze to stop me from crying.
my mum heard my crying stop abruptly so came to investigate and found my brother strangling me, she speaks of this often and with amusement...all it does is hurt me everytime she brings it up. My brother beat me and bullied me every day of my life until I walked away. a typical day with him was having my face rammed into a sliding door, broken nose was a regular thing for me.
It was a natural progression to be in a series of relationships where I was abused which is bullying whether some people call it that or not. I finally broke free of that 6 years ago and have been working through things since.
I really feel like thanking the person this situation occurred with. Everything fell into place and now I understand much of what I didn't before it happened.
As I said to one person, it was a watershed event for me and I am very grateful because it has brought a level of understanding that I didn't have before it; how I have been afraid of so many things since being very badly molested at 3 and several times after that. It seems I was trained to be nothing but a victim but I have come this far without actually having the victim mentality, just not knowing any better except that I react to seeing others bullied and to being bullied myself. Victim mentality is something that is a choice, I've never had a victim mentality, because to me it was normal and I knew nothing different.
If I put up with it then I can expect no different. That is what this is about. If I stand up and say go to hell I am empowering myself...but others would see that as bullying so there is no escaping it one way or the other...lollll
Thanks so much Ygrec for "listening" and especially for helping guide me through it
Rhia