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Old Jul 09, 2010, 09:57 AM
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bobbi416 bobbi416 is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2010
Location: Bucks County, Pa.
Posts: 121
Thanks for all the support, I finally figured some of the site out. I found my way back to here, sorry for the delay. I have just been overwhelmed with everything. I have been using the site to distract me from all the repetative thoughts, but then I find someone with simular situations and I'm right back where I started. I SO SICK OF BEING SICK!!! I really need to get back into therapy but at the time we just can't afford it, this really sucks and only makes it worse. Back in May, I was put in the hospital because I thought I was having a heart attach. (very scarry) But my heart is fine, my blood preassure was 181/110 they said I could have had a stroke. They kept me for 2 days with no DX. I've come to the conclusion that it was a panic attack. I've been through a battery of testing from 2 specialist now, Cardiologist and every thing is fine with my heart. He sent me to a GI, doctor for the Asophigas (speelig?) and stomach, he did an Endoscopy and took biopsy, no cancer.
But the swallowing X-ray indicates a slow flap ( the flap in throat that controls windpipe and food,) so that explains choking and coughing while eating. But now I have to see a EARs,NOSE, and THROAT specialist. THe GI thinks there may be a problem there.

So you see this has really made my deression even worse, I'm back to the place where I feel I would be better off ..........well you know. Hopeless, 40 yrs of this **** and I'm just so tired of it. Why can't I be noraml. Hah, normal is there such a thing. I can't even focus on my drawing, no interest at the moment. I find myself being drawn back here every day. So I'm finally writing it down in hopes that someone will read it, and just to get it out of my head. Thanks for listening (reading). Hope your having a better day than me.
bobbi