Shadowghost, I am very sorry for your loss. I see you are suffering greatly because of it.

May I ask you something? Do you think your brother is holding you responsible for him dying? Do you think he blames you for his death?

I only ask, because I don't know what your relationship was like or what your brother was like and his beliefs.

I truly hope that you will find some peace Shadowghost. I believe you deserve peace.