S'ok! blk,

I do hope you find resolution to both sets of issues because I am certain that your partental issue has a powerful effect on your mental state too.

No one deserves to suffer mental anguish especially when they are trying to do the right thing by their responsibilities but is fighting the spectre of blackness and trying to bring a semblance of balance and normality though that is a sliding scale with a different value for each person.

What ever happens just keep plugging away at it and you will eventually have a breakthrough.

Do you actually like your job?