Nine years sober is great you should be so proud of that and so should your family and friends.

I know and understand feelings of guilt and shame, how they pull you apart and fill the cracks with self hatred. But it is the past, and the most important thing is that you have changed your future and the futures of those who might have been hurt if you hadn't changed things.

Allow yourself to look to the future and see the brightness there and realise that you have done something major something powerful that not everyone has had the courage to do, that is face the guilt and shame; stare it in the face and say "I changed things so you have no power over me any more".

You have the power and strength within you to change anything in your life, and you used it for the good of everyone; those who love you know that you were not in full control when you were drunk and that is not you now.

You are Mrhomercat! the one who quit drinking, quit drinking and driving, and saved lives! That is something to be so proud of and so happy with. I don't know you but I'm proud of you, because it could be one of my friends whose life you saved by changing things, so thank you...

Rhiannon