All i can tell you is if he can cross this line ...in his head...its a thin line between him and the child.My mom stayed with a man who did...things....for the sake of his kids from a previous marriageI resent it horribly.You are the only defense this child has,and I feel he has crossed the largest trust boundary ever.If you wouldn't leave for this what would you leave for?My heart says staying ...or allowing any contact outside a guarded visit is roulette and has the potential to create a psychologically bruised child at the least.But that is me.