Thank you all for your responses so far. This is such a tough topic to speak with anyone about - I appriciate the additional perspectives. My head is also telling me there's just no way to make this safe. It feels a bit more difficult because I have some subtle pressure from my family, whom I am very close to, about not making any hasty decisions, and not giving up right away. I've got an appointment with a counseler in a couple of days, I am hoping I can maybe get a bit of clarity from an outside source then too, but this is also helpful. So thanks everyone.