Hello anxietygirl,

I know exactly how you are feeling about your marriage, I stayed years after it was over...what a waste of a decade I could have been living in peace or having fun or I could have met the man I love a lot sooner and been happier a lot sooner.

I know you feel the primary issue is the drug smuggler who I would have been worried was trying to groom your son as a minor to move drugs for him (minors can't be chraged or jailed). But what I see as the primary concern is your unhappiness in your marriage.

I really hope that you look at it the way it is and that he is a manipulative person who engineered what he wanted from you...so he thought...but you sorted him out...very well I think because being a drug smuggler on parole he wouldn't want a phone in his own name, too easy to trace, if it's in your name then he's as free as a bird to organise what ever he wants drug wise...and believe me just because he's been in jail doesn't mean he would stop his activities.

I think you've done the right thing and you are so well rid off him...as the others have said you can save your marriage if you want to but you have to want to. If you think you would be happier elsewhere then leave,

Rhiannon