It's all learned behavior Pink_Lotus and everyone has to practice/try different things to see what works for them. Your not swinging your arms reminded me of my carrying my books at my side instead of in front of me like a "girl" was supposed to (I have 3 older brothers). I never did master it well as it was just more comfortable to me to carry them at my side.

It is never to late to learn because other people tell us how we affect them. Your friend wants you to be a couple and you don't want that so it's probably a good idea if you get some distance from him. That's all you can do, see how your behavior affects other people and try to adjust to it. With the opposite sex that can be even more difficult because, while they can be friends, they usually are also mates or brothers.

For me, friends are there when I need them (or I'm there when they need me) and keep in touch but are not a constant thing. One's self and what one is doing in their own life should take priority and, sometimes people come along who fit in to what we're doing for awhile or we with what they're doing. Very few friends last for more than 10-20 years, usually only those we had when we were young and kept up to date with. I have a couple good friends from high school (1960's) but even the couple friends I made since (1970's and 80's) I no longer see or communicate with.

I have a couple friends now; one is a guy (also friends with my husband, use to work for my husband) and we might meet for dinner or something but we each have our own space and interests. I was just out of town and he came and took care of my two cats (he has cats also) while I was away. We're not constantly with each other, friends don't usually have time for that unless they're mates too. My husband and I are friends. My girlfriend I haven't see for a couple months but have talked on the phone once or twice and I know where she "is" in case I were to need her help and she knows she can call me if she needs mine.

Friends are more about "interests". One meets them in school or at a club meeting of some sort or in a group on the internet, etc. But as life goes on and that school/club/group and its place in one's life changes, the friendship changes too or dissolves because the interest isn't enough. My best friends (from high school) live far away from me and I, from them but we have a long, shared "past" so that works of glue kind of. My two current friends; we have pizza on Tuesday nights with the guy and he helps with the cats and house and we exchange the favor for him. He doesn't work currently and we're retired but he's looking for a job and when he gets one, I'm sure the relationship will change some, we won't see as much of him. My girlfriend finished the project I was helping her with and also got a job and is much busier now and we don't have as much in common anymore, don't see or talk to each other as much. I have no doubt if I called her and needed her help with something that she'd be there but both of us are busy with other things than those that kept us together in the past.