My life just continues to get more complicated. My psychiatrist is worried about my drinking, my addictions Dr. is worried about my mental health, my psychologist is generally worried. They're all talking.

When I went into the hospital this morning to take my supervised Antabuse, I saw my addictions Dr., she my nurse and I had a brief meeting. She and the nurse are worried that I need more MH support than i'm currently getting, they're primarily focused on my addiction and think I need closer psychiatric supervision. They were thinking of refering me to the day hospital program at their hospital, but decided it was less than optimal to start me over in a new psychiatric program when I'm already in the system at CAMH (major psych hospital in town). So they insisted I call my psychiatrist today, which I did. After talking to him for a while, he's decided that the best option for me, is the mood and anxiety disorder's residential program. I forget if it's 21 or 28 days, but it's definitely time limited.

According to him, and according to what I've read on the hospital's site it's not like being in a traditional psych hospital ward. I've seen pictures of the rooms & they look more like university dorm rooms than what I call the early cell look of the floor I was on the last time I was IP at CAMH. They apparently have all kinds of group therapy during the day.

It scares me. I don't honestly know if I need that level of care, but I do know I'm not doing so hot on my own right now, so i accepted the referal.

I'm also trying to do everything I can to keep both Dr's happy and believing I'm doing everything I can to keep stable, so that they won't yank my driver's licence.

I just don't know how my life got so out of control so fast.

--splitimage