Thread: Friends
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Old Jul 17, 2010, 09:47 AM
anon19529
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kayelless View Post
I'm a naturally friendly person so it's not difficult for me to reach out to others when meeting them; however I understand what you're saying. It's not easy to trust people. It's not easy to let down our guard and allow ourselves to be seen for who we are.

One of the things I will put forth is this question for you to ask and answer for yourself. Are you judgmental and opinionated about others? Are you concerned with how they look, talk, or what their race or cultural identity is?

Quite naturally we all consider these things to an extent so the answers are not a matter of problematic proportions, but here is the point of consideration. If we are looking at others that way, maybe we're putting those same types of parameters on ourselves when we consider how they might be viewing us.

Case in point - We might be self conscious about our appearance, worried that others see our flaws as a negative characteristic in us and therefore are lest likely to want to befriend us. Truth is many persons don't care what we look like and are quite willing to get to know us just as we are. It can very difficult to recognize this truth if we are holding up that same standard that we think is/isn't appealing against ourselves.

Now I have no idea if that is something you're dealing with, but it's something that might be getting in your way of meeting and making friends so I thought I would mention it. Only you can tell and it's only you who needs the answers to these questions.

Is that helpful to you in some way?
I'm not judgmental or opinionated at all. Race, how people look, or how people talk does not affect me when I meet people. I don't judge based on those things. If someone's nice to me, I'm nice to them. It just seems when I was in my teens, I could make friends easier than now that I'm an adult. I'm not sure if it's just society today, people are afraid, or something I portray to others. Yes, it does get lonely at times.