Thanks again everyone! Of course, the hubs didn't get home until nearly 7 pm, so I was stuck, literally tethered to a screaming, teething baby! I think separation anxiety is setting in, too. Of course when he gets home, she is all smiles. I don't get it. Sometimes I think she likes him more. I can only guess it's because when he has her by himself, he doesn't do anything else. I, on the other hand, try to engage her AND do household stuff. Laundry, dishes, bills, whatever. She gets spoiled by him and by the time I get her she is expecting me to drop everything to play. I kinda resent that he gets the best time with her without worrying about anything else. If I didn't do anything else but play with her all day, my life, house, finances would all be in shambles. I would LOVE to play with her all day. I always end up feeling like I am neglecting her by setting her down in her pack and play while I do other stuff. Anyone else feel this way about their kids?

I get scared sometimes on days like today that I am going to flip out when she screams all day. I was trying to replace some batteries for one of her noise maker things so she could take a nap and I ended up slamming the screwdriver on the counter because she wouldn't quiet down. She wasn't near me, she was upstairs, but I still feel horrible for it. Sometimes, in my deepest, deepest pit in my soul, I get scared that one day I will hurt her because I flipped out and couldn't handle it. I pray everyday that I will always have the sense to walk away and shut the door before I get that upset. I could NEVER forgive myself if something happened to her because of me. Is it normal for me to feel this way? To worry that I will hurt someone that I love? Well nothing about the way I ever feel is normal, but I mean is it normal for me? or anyone like us for that matter? I have never been violent with anyone when I am having an episode, so I don't think I would. There have been times when I wanted badly to punch my husband in the face, but hey who hasn't wanted to do that from time to time. Sometimes he is an extremely dense asshole. I love him dearly though.