Welcome Imalone!
You have found a great group of supporters here.
I am so very sorry about your losses. I am also available to talk with through PM's, or here, whatever is more comfortable for you.
I lost my dad when I was a little girl.
I also suffered a great loss when my two brothers died within five years of each other. One was 38 and one was 42.
I understand and extend my heartfelt sympathy.
Petunia