I hope today is going better. Is there anyway that you can cut down how much you do during the day when you are alone with your daughter? I suffer from perfectionism as well, but sometimes I need to ask myself "will the world end if I don't finish the laundry today?". Are there any programs that you can go to during the day with other new moms (if you aren't doing that already?) Are you able to have someone watch her, so you can have a break? As far as your daughter liking your husband more than you I highly doubt that, but children can sense our energy and if your tank is empty or your stressed that may be what she's responding to.

Another really important aspect is postpartum depression that can last up to 1 year. I took a BP education group when I was first diagnosed and asked one of the P-doc presenters what the likelihood would be that I would pass on BP if I had children and he said there was a much higher chance to have PPD.