(((((SHAKTI)))))
Thanks for sharing that with us. I can imagine the depression, pain and dispair you were going through.
I wish there was a way I could just make you feel better. I wish there really was such a thing as a "happy pill" - to take away the pain and confusion.

You are lucky to have a partner that loves you the way he does; but don't bash yourself up about responses you may have that are actually your illness.
We all do our best to be the best person we can be, the best mom, father, partner, sister, daughter, son.... We are not entirely to blame for any shortfalls. We have been dealt a difficult stumbling block in life, but we need to overcome it - climb above it.

Shakti - you are in inspiration to me, as I can see the emotions you are going through - despair, depression, anger, frustration... Yet you do your utmost to rise above it.