Quote:
Originally Posted by chaosrob
I do not know how many people may experience this so it will be helpful if I can get some feedback.
Now there are times when I will do something for someone thinking that I am doing it for one reason. But afterwords I realize that I may have done it out of a much more selfish reasons.
I figure it could be several things. It's possible that I just loathe myself so much that I do not want to allow myself to feel good about helping others out.
It's possible that I just over analyze everything and given my pessimistic nature see the possible bad easier than the good.
I may actually do things that appear to be out of kindness but am actually using the opportunity to manipulate the emotions of the other person.
Granted for the most part I do actually help people. I find that when something mutually benefits both parties that life is generally easier. Of course there are times where I seem to end up ahead even if things do not work according to plan.
Does anyone else ever experience things like this where they are unsure whether they can trust their own reasoning behind a given situation?
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Sure. I don't trust my own reasoning around the corner. Let it get out of sight and it takes off into all kinds of nonsense. Reasoning is a highly overrated attribute of humanity. As you say, most of what we do is for ourselves. BUT THAT DOESN'T STOP IT FROM BEING GOOD FOR OTHERS! I like being here on PC. Not even half of that liking is because of the help rendered to me here by others. The majority is because of the opportunities it gives me to help others in pain. It makes me feel good to help them feel good. What's wrong with that? I have the idea (could be right, could be wrong) that people from some religious traditions believe totally in (what can I call it) COMPLETE altruism. PURE altruism. Altruism absolutely unsullied by any speck of self-help. There is no such thing. In REAL human life, doing good to others AT THE VERY LEAST feels good. And feeling good is something you do for yourself. You can't get away from that. That's the way human beings (who evolved that way) work and operate. Yes, you can do good to others. Lots of good. At great cost to yourself. Many people do. Look in detail at people who spend their lives around the world working for organizations that pay them a pittance but permit them to help others. But they LIKE what they're doing! You can't get away from that. And that's a "self" satisfaction. You can do lots of good to or for others, but you can't do it without feeling somehow satisfied or happy about it yourself.
Hope this helped you somehow. Take care.
