200mg Tegretol and 20mg Lorien daily at night.
Last night, I was "hearing" how I didn't deserve this nice guy, how I don't really matter to him, and I ended up arguing with my mind out loud again When I got home at around 23:30, the house was quiet, and "they" started again,I know where that road leads... Last time, I woke up with an X and a check mark on either arm I'm so glad I was exhausted, b/c sometimes the arguing goes on right through the night...

Coping? I only know how to fake it, never learned anything else, and I think the facade is what's making my melting worse!

Crumbling, unraveling, scared, mess

I don't want this, any of it.