Hi, again. We all understand the release, even if it's small, after we write things out here where other people understand what we're feeling. I'm a writer, too. It's easier to write my feelings out than it is to say them. It's good, too, to go back and re-read things from the past because I gain so much insight or see how far I've come or regressed.

What I've done in the past is not talk about my problems so much to friends or family that don't really have a clue what it is to have anxiety and depression. They just don't seem to "get it." Places like this one, where other people understand, has been the safest and best for me. People that don't understand get so tired of hearing about our problems and we eventually push them away.

Yes, meds seem to stop working after a while. I've been on several in the past 20+ years. I had the best luck with Prozac until all of a sudden, it started making my palpitations 100 times worse... so... I had to try different meds until the Dr. found one that works for me. Even now, sometimes it feels like it's not working 100%. I stress out and start feeling mounting anxiety whenever I step out of my comfort zone... which gets boring after a while!

Your wording, "different proviences" leads to to believe you don't live in the States. Does your government have Workmen's Compensation or Disability programs? I filed for Disability and will finally get it in the next couple of weeks. It's impossible to hold down a job with anxiety and/or depression when it gets bad, although having a part time job close to home would at least make you get out of the house and give you a sense of accomplishment. Only you can be the judge of what's best for you, though.

Anyway... keep coming back and posting. We're here to listen and commiserate with you.