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Callista
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Member Since Feb 2008
Location: United States
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Default Jul 21, 2010 at 01:30 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by melissa.recovering View Post
Thanks for the reply. I have heard of asexuality, and when I was younger (maybe 15?) I decided I WAS asexual. But then I realized that I was attracted to both sexes physically...(as in, I can have fantasies about them), but I don't want a relationship with either sex. So I identify myself as a bisexual, but really I'd never go out with anybody from either sex. So I'm not sure what to think. Am I bisexual or asexual?
There are people who identify as bi-asexual, who are interested in both genders but who don't want to actually have sex. Also hetero-asexual and homo-asexual (these are terms usually used by people who want platonic relationships) and aromantic/asexual for people who don't want romance at all. There's also the category "autosexual" for people who only masturbate and don't want to have sex with anyone else (many asexuals do masturbate because it's a physically pleasant sensation). Some asexuals have fantasies that they would never want to act on; it's really the lack of desire to actually have sex that's the dividing line. As I said before, though, human sexuality isn't really a list of categories, but a spectrum.

There's nothing stopping an asexual person from seeing asthetic beauty in another human being, really. I do. I just don't want to take them to bed.

You may just be sitting awkwardly on the line between "asexual" and "low sex drive", with probably more in common with asexual than bisexual folks. As you grow and change you may shift somewhat along either axis, but for the most part people don't really go all that far from where they started. Some asexuals even get married and have sex for the sake of their partners (takes an awful lot of compromise but can work for the ones that just kind of think "meh" about sex)... there's more to romance than just sex; a lot more.

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