Quote:
Originally Posted by peaches100
... I know that while you want to help me, you don’t feel attached or love me like a parent. It’s a horrible, painful reality I have to learn. I have to stop wanting it. There’s nobody who could ever love child parts that way. If I could get rid of the child parts, I could get rid of the desire and need. That is why at times like this, I really wish they were not a part of me.....
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Part of you does know that the T does not love like a parent, or feel the attachment like us.
It's hard to accept this, so hard, when you are open and vulnerable.
Even though I've aligned the neediness in me with my inner child, I know it's a part of me, an element of me that I carry as part of my whole. What SAWE said, it's YOU that has to learn to love the child parts, meet those desires and needs - OK, that's what MY exT used to tell me also. I've not got a good idea of how to get there, I just know it will take time.
Here's what he told me:
"The good news is that the information is there in the needy, clingy, young girl. I am happy to ask her about what she needs from you during that needy time. Then it will be up to you to find a way of providing that.
By the way you can get started on this on your own. It takes time and quiet. You can start by taking pen and paper and asking, (very gently) what does the young girl need from me (BlackCanary). Or "how can I best help you." Let her write through you. Don't edit or try to educate her or explain anything, just witness her and her feelings."
