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Jul 22, 2010, 07:53 AM
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Member Since: May 2008
Location: Alabama, USA
Posts: 1,309
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I told him. It was scary. Really, really scary. I was shaking like anything.
So yeah, I told him that I felt like I was gonna burst if I didn't just tell him. So, I did it and asked him how he felt. He said that he does feel something for me, just not as strong as what I do for him. Then he said that right now he's not so good with relationships.
Not sure what to think, because those two things kind of contradicted each other. Having thought about it, I feel like that is just an excuse for "I'm a 26 y/o guy, still immature and just want to be able to sleep with who I want when I want and flirt etc. with who I want when I want." Which is fair enough, but seriously? For a 26 year old to be like that?!? It doesn't make sense to me... Then again it could've just meant he's not ready for a relationship yet because like me, he just wants to be single for a while and not feel trapped and tied down because he's recently come out of a relationship like I have (i don't know how recently)...
But yeah... I'm not sure whether to just put this down as a lost cause or to keep trying. He hardly ever talks to me anymore, I never have any texts from him anymore and when he's online, it's like I'm not even there. He's on the tail of another girl, Sally, who's pretty and older than me, so more likely to get him because maybe he fears I'm too young and immature for him, or maybe too mature for him, I don't know.
I'm totally stuck and am now searching everyday for a new guy.
One of my friends, a very close friend, proposed to me a couple of weeks ago. I thought he was joking, until the next morning when he told me he'd been deadly serious. I said that I didn't know. Then we spoke about it a bit and I said I'm not ready to be tied down yet, after having just come out of an abusive 4 year relationship, I don't trust men very easily and I just want to get used to standing on my own 2 feet etc. Since then he's been trying to get me to get into a relationship with him and has even taken me ring shopping. It's such a huge pressure, yet I'm so tempted to go for it because he is in fact a lovely guy... But I don't want to make another mistake with relationships and I just don't want to rush into things... I don't think he's someone I see myself with for the rest of my life...
I'm so confused and stuck and just so desperate to be loved 
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