Yeah i did come here because its a problem, and the problem is mainly because I like it so much, which is the reason why its so bad for me.
And yes I can make a different choice, i just, i need to break the.. addiction (I hate that word)
And involuntarily, well, its all my fault, i'm the one who screwed up big time in the first palce so its my responsibility, its my fault i'm like this.