Zoo, I could have written your post, word for word.
I don't want to need and want my T so much, either, but I do. I used to find reasons to call my former T, but with my current one I let myself email her after every session, and she's okay with that. I google her too. It's obsessive sometimes. I print her emails and read them over and over. I think it's because we want to feel the connection. It's a compulsion for me that I am trying to just accept though I feel like it's not normal.

My former T always told me that she would rather I tell her I just wanted to hear her voice than "make up a reason" to call. I had trouble doing that, though. But most Ts accept that wanting to touch base IS a good enough reason to call or email. Do you know what your T thinks?

oops, I wish I could tell you that it is a phase and will pass. For me, it continues. Others may tell you that it gets better, I hope.

I do know that I can think about the connection with my T and not necessarily always feel the urge to contact her. Re-reading all of the emails she sent me, as well as her homepage online helps me feel connected. The only time it hurts rather then helps is if I go to Facebook and get upset that everything except one photo is private. She's pretty open about her personal life, though, and in the 5 months I've been with her, I know her kids' and family members' names and where they go to school. It helps me to know about her. Posting about her like right now helps me keep the connection too. Anyway, you are NOT alone!!