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I can relate to you on so many levels. The anger and lashing out is one thing I always have to check myself on. It's sooooo hard!
I have obsessive thoughts quite often. It sucks!
I wish I had some advice, but know that I am thinking of you!
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"The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open." 
Don’t look where you fall, but where you slipped. 
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