BC --- ok you just made my day - sorry Tree as it is not meant at your expense and I totally agree with what others are sharing - and I hope you have inner peace about all this because you DO deserve it. But maybe it will make you feel better if you know somethings I have done with my T! And I didn't even think it would be boundary crossing until BC just said it!!

I play Sims 3 and I have 7 different avatars of my T running all over my town!!! I have my own avatar I play. And I gave each avatar of T different traits I think he has. Then I love to watch my Avatar run into my T in town and talk or dance together -- or more. But when I get angry with my T, I take one of his avatars and move him into my main house where I then kinda torture him a bit in the SIM way (stuff like sticking him in a room with no doors or windows so he goes crazy) and I will yell at my computer at him asking him how he likes to feel the way I am feeling right then. I don't do that much.. but it was very cathardic the times I have done it. And after I was done, I felt much better and thought nothing else of it.

The other thing I did once was to use a morphing program on-line and took his face from his public website and morphed it with my face and made the result a child. The program made a VERY real looking picture of a child who looked like both of us put together. It was haunting actually!! The eyes of that morphed child showed something that I never saw in my own eyes but felt it there. So I actually emailed that pic to myself and brought it into session on my ipad and showed T the image!

He was kinda shocked by it and blown away I think and asked me how I did it and how I got the image of him and I told him. Then we talked about how the eyes were the eyes of someone who has been abused and survived... The picture of the kid was actually a very beautiful child!!!! He thought at first it was a picture of me when I was little - lol. Now it took guts to show him that. But I trusted that he knew me well enough to not throw me out the door just for that. :-)