Thank you rainbow for posting this. I too feel the same way about my T. A part of me loves her and another part of me doesn't like her and doesn't want to be close to her/ allow myself to be vulnerable to my feelings in her pressence. For me it's about self preservation in terms of not being vulerable however i have that internal tug of war. - Wanting to be loved, feeling needy, and equally wanting to push my T away. There's a part of me that feels sad that she will never be everything to me. I'm always looking for that 'perfect relationship' to fulfill the little girl needs.

Wishing you peace.