Thanks rhino, I really needed to hear that. I need to make the most of the time while I am here or it was just wasted time. And it could be a lot worse than it is.
I don't think it will be irrational whatever we decide. We wouldn't do anything that would put us in financial peril. I have crunched the numbers and know what we will have to work with for different sale prices on the house. I have tried to include all expenses and guessed on the high side when I wasn't sure. We are discussing all options and weighing them carefully.

Ok here's the deal with the realtor. He is an actual realtor with a real estate company. He is just doing us a favor at the same time. We like him and are using him bc he helped us find a place to rent and then a place to buy when we first moved here. He did us right back then. Back in Feb. when we first put the house up for sale we listed the house with the realtor. He put the listing up online and all the normal stuff. Well we didn't even get calls on it, much less any showings. I live next to the border of Mexico where hardly anyone has internet. We felt like this was the reason we weren't getting calls. So the realtor put an ad in the local newspaper and we started getting calls. Well ads are expensive and I found out that it is not customary for a realtor to spend money on ads in papers. So he offered us a deal. He said he felt like we were much more likely to sell the house through the paper than through the listing. In order for us to be able to lower the sale price on the house he agreed to leave the listing up til it expires (it's still up), let us continue to run the ads in the paper at our own expense, and help us with closing when the time came for a small fee MUCH smaller than commission. Hubby and I couldn't think of any reason not to do this, so this is how we have handled it. We thought it would save money. We are still getting some calls from the paper ad, but none from the listing online.
What do you guys think, is this realtor up to something, or is he just trying to help us out?

Well the reason the sister is handling the sale makes sense to me in one aspect, but there are other aspects that confuse me. Here is what makes sense:
The couple I am dealing with are winter Texans. That means that they spend their winter months down here and return home up north for the summer. These people live down here in their RV about 95% of the year. Basically, they are here and he is not so they are handling finding him a house.
The brother lives in PA but wants to buy a house down here for a summer home. The plan is for the couple to live in their brothers house that he buys 95% of the time, and he will come to visit from time to time. The house has an extra apartment attached, so this was a plus for accomadating their needs.
What doesn't make sense is why the brother won't let them be involved in the financing of the house if they will be living in it most of the time anyway.
The couple say they want to be involved in the sale. The original plan was for the brother to put a large chunk of $ down on the house and then the couple would finance the rest. They want to do this bc they will be living in it and want to have some say so in decisions regarding the house.
They are telling me that the brother has changed his mind and no longer wants them to be a part of the deal financially. He wants to pay all his cash for the house so it is only his. That's why he is offering me less than the first offer, bc that's all the cash he has. The couple tell me that they are trying to talk him into going back to the original plan so that they can have say so in the deal, and if they do they will buy it for the 4000 less than asking.
I called them last night to ask if they had reached a decision bc I hadn't heard from them since Friday. Told them we still won't go as low as taking the 9000 hit, but we will still take their first offer of 4000 less. They said the brother is out of town on business until Wed and he wants to mull it over until then. They said they would call Wed or Thursday.
Hubby and I have been talking. If they decide not to buy it for the first offer they made of 4000 less, we may give it a while and call and see if they will buy it for the 9000 hit. It will be a tough break but we can handle it financially. It's just not ideal. We still don't know about that though. Just chewing on it in case it comes about in the future.