Thanks for the encouragement, rainbow and SAWE. I have been making little inroads here and there with my Dad since the start of the year. Nothing like the talk about feelings that my T envisioned, but a start, perhaps. We have touched each other a few times, and it is the first time I can remember doing that. Even as a little girl, I did not have physical contact with either of my parents (at least of the positive variety). Maybe, as you wrote, Rainbow, I will end up with some hugs and sending some positive vibes but not have the conversations. I fear making my Dad feel bad because if I try to have a meaningful conversation with him, I know I will start crying. I don't want to be a downer sort of person--he has enough on his plate without me being all sad. I also have a hard time thinking of crying around either of my parents since I didn't get to do that when I was little. It is a huge tug between wanting to be closer and express some feelings and straining mightily not to cry. It gives me a headache and makes me feel exhausted. Probably my T would say well just cry, but it isn't so simple.... I think I will just strive, for now, to spend some time with my Dad. I enjoy that. And bringing my girls to visit too.