Thanks for the hugs people.

I'm still feelling unstable. One minute I'm fine, the next I feel like bursting into tears.

I don't have any friends in real life. All my social interactions come from being online. Right now I'm handling the block OK, but I've been completely devastated in the past. I still might go there, 4 weeks is a long time.

I've really messed up my life. I've been really depressed, sleeping all day, skipping classes and skipping midterms. I don't know what I'm going to do.

I really want to get my B.Sc., I have to do well in school. I got desperate after skipping 2 midterms...so desperate I ended up threatening things on that other site. Threatening to do bad things. People got fed up with me when I didn't go to the hospital. People started to think I was being manipulative.

Maybe I am sometimes, I have a BPD, but I was still in a lot of pain. It is soooo difficult for me. I don't know how to help myself. I don't know how to soothe myself. I don't know how to make things better on that site.

<font color="green">Greenleaves</font>