Well, vjdragonfly, I'm not really sure. Mostly it was probably just taking it moment by moment, and not looking ahead, you know? I didn't really have enough energy to think how I was going to make it through. <Shrug> I didn't even know what coping mechanisms were, let alone about PC at that point, but wow, looking back, I sure wish I did! Although misdiagnosed and mismedicated, I *did* have a therapist at the time, and that seriously was a real lifeline, even though I don't think it accomplished much else (she focused *way* too much on old family stuff and not nearly enough on *what to do right now*). Even having one hour a week to talk to someone was more than I was used to, and it really did help.

You know, speaking of your son... I too worried about this. Strange thing. One day, sitting somewhere and flipping through a magazine, there was that ad (for Abilify maybe??) where there's the pictures of all these different modes. He said, "That's you." I said, "What? Nah." I knew it was, actually, but didn't want to admit to it. "DX'd" by a kid. Who knew? In fact, remember at one point much earlier on saying, "It's like a roller coaster with him!" Little did I know how that one sentence would resonate after my dx. Was it him, or was it me, or was it both? I only know one part of that equation so far. But the thing is, you do what you can and don't worry about it. It is what it is. Sometimes people think that is a dumb saying, but it really isn't. We do what we can. Kids are amazingly accepting over time. (They *do* have their moments of ripping our hearts out to be sure, but in the larger picture...) Trying to eliminate as many "shoulds" as you can can help from beating yourself up over things you have little control over (oh, ok, apparently I did learn something else in therapy! )

to you... You can do it. Really.