bridgie, I get a feeling of regression when i read your post. Returning to old patterns and the past. It puts you in a place where you do not feel acknowledged and valued. Maybe slipping back to old habits after healing adn moving forward. And you may be beating yourself up over it.
Just review where you seemed to have lost ground and try to determine why. Then relax, take a deep breath and get up and start again. There is hope. And when we stumble, there is no "sin" in it...
It is like trying to walk uphill on a giant slide that has a flood of water raging down it. As long as we keep moving up the slide, we make slow but steady progress. If we stumble or fall, we are washed backward, but when we stand up and begin to move again, we again make progress. It is when we fall, adn stay down that we get swept away by the water, and find ourselves needing to "start over".
Pause, look around, what tripped you? Deal with it and continue on. Give it your best effort, that is all you can expect from yourself. You would not expect more than that from others... And one day your bast effort may be 100% and then the next day, your best effort may be 25%...and that is ok.