Thank you AAAAA. I am trying so hard to do what is right. I know I shouldn't be so overwhelmed, but to me being a parent is so incredibly hard. I was abused and neglected by my mother and step fathers, so maybe that's why I am so scared of doing something wrong.

He is really miserable at school. I think that I would be able to teach him because I've taught (granted, only substituting) for several years now and I think I do a good job. So, you homeschooled your twins? I really, really feel like he would learn so much more and be better served to be homeschooled, but I doubt myself so much that I am terrified to take the plunge. I am trying to be brave. I have read a lot of homeschooling books and followed a few secular homeschooling bloggers, it just seems so much better. Those kids always are so far "ahead" of where my son is in school. They haven't even taught him cursive writing and the times tables I've taught him at home, but he gets no practice at school.

Anyway, I know half of what I say makes no sense, I am so tormented and conflicted right now. Oh ya, he could still play with the neighbor (yes, the freaking crazy ***, awful parents neighbor) and his 3 cousins live 3 hours away so we do see them fairly regularly.

I feel like I am having a nervous breakdown. My husband has been out of town for a few weeks now and won't be back until next Weds (not tomorrow). I just want to cry and cry.