It is a good thing if h can tell who is in, but hard to get used to when we're used to pretending there is only one of us.

Since my h has learned to tell which one of us he is talking to, things have been easier most of the time (i won't lie & say he'll never throw it back at you, in an argument).
The fact that some of us hold unpleasant memories has led to some confrontation with the h, but we have resolved issues neither of us understood at the time they happened.
Things will never be the same as before you all started to talk, but in the end things will be better.
Change is hard for DDers. Definitely wait till T is around before you talk, especially if h in habit of taking control.
You will need T's validation if h resists reality of memories, or meaning of memories.
(((((Crystal))))) You are doing a hard job well, we wish you could having nothing but good, but life's not like that.