I don't want to upset anyone else, but I've been very suicidal lately. Haven't called a hotline or a councellor, because I don't want anyone trying to talk me out of this. If I choose to not hurt myself, it'll be because I didn't want to, not because someone else convinced me not to. The idea doesn't scare me any more. I'm not feeling particularly depressed, either. I don't feel anything, really.