Heh, breathing is part of my problem. When I start getting really worked up, the first thing that happens is that I start taking incredibly fast, shallow breaths. Except that I don't breathe in. Just out. If that makes any sense... :/ Any attempt to control it usually just makes it worse. XD Counting helps a little bit. If I do it right, I can usually do things that only make me mildly anxious. Like turning out my light, or laying down to go to sleep.

Maybe a time limit. Except that those never work because when I get all the way to the end, I add more time. XD

We're supposed to be going to our cabin in the woods this weekend. I really don't want to go, because I know I'll be really panic-y. It'll be badbadbad. But I can't stay home by myself because there's been robberies and rapes in the neighborhood recently (and because I'll be even worse here). Maybe I can tell her... soonish? I dunno. I'm pretty sure I could talk to her about it, I just really don't want to talk to my dad. Or have him around at all. I don't know why.

I'll try. I can try to tell my mom at least, and she can tell my dad maybe. Or something. I dunno. This is just so ****ed up. I used to be normal...