I had a dream last night that my T moved her office and changed her phone # without telling me. Then I saw her in public somewhere and she wouldn't talk to me. It was sad. I called her this morning and told her about the dream, because it felt so real and even though I KNEW it was just a dream, I had to make sure. It really shows me how much this stuff is on my mind and how huge my fear of abandonment is.

I'm torn between wanting to take a break from trauma work, to slow things down a little bit at least, and wanting to just power through it and be done. I know my T doesn't think taking a break at this point would be helpful. But I also know she thinks I'm stronger than I do. I don't know. I guess at my next session I can talk to her about maybe just slowing down a little bit. I just don't know if that will help or if it would just prolong the agony.