I go through spans of time where I frequently wake up to a panic attack (not always, it's just that they seem to go in clusters). Super irritable.... hmmm. Am not remembering so much waking up that way, but there definitely are times that it doesn't take long to get there(!)

On the diagnosis, you had said elsewhere that you were recently diagnosed. How recently? There are times I think, "no, this can't be so...maybe there's nothing wrong with me". (HA!) Those moments don't come very often, but they do make brief apprearances, often when I'm wanting to ditch meds. They are very common in BP, probably because of the cyclical nature of it. Sometimes it's more obvious than others, yeah? Around the time I was diagnosed, whenever things from the past would come to mind, I'd write them down. When I'm doubting/wanting to go off meds, and conveniently "forgetting" the evidence, I can look at that and get a thorough reality check. Not to say that I don't sometimes try to "minimize" what I see, but there's something about seeing it there in black and white, written in my own hand (ie. it's not just what someone else has said), and the years and years and years of evidence that helps bring me back to reality.

Don't know if that helps, but you're sure not alone.