I am sorry your T is being this hard on his own support to you for the ED.
I do understand how a T may not be able to/ or qualified to / help with ED or SI, but they should never just tell a client to "fix it" or "just don't do it" - that is not good therapy.

My T is an addictions expect so I think that he must know that saying "Don't SI" will not help. He has to provide me with alternative options and different ways to look at the work. He did that in email Friday when I was very low and he said "Where is your drum?" That was the entire email! But he did IT. I knew he was giving me an option rather than saying "I don't want to hear about it." or "Don't do it."

I am very sorry that you are with a T who has not yet learned how to deal with the ED situation. I hope you will bring it back up to him and maybe even let him know how other T's act around things like that. And let him see exactly what his response to you felt like from your point of view. This is not to be mean to T or anything. It is because your T needs to know what impact that communication had on a client.

A good T will learn from the experience and maybe change the way their viewpoint is presented. The T may still not be willing or able to deal with the ED, but they should understand how to safely get the client to the help they do need. My own T has often suggested other experts on things he was not qualified or able to handle. He even has experts for certain parts of his own therapy work that his T can't handle.

Keep on being honest and keep posting about your feelings here.