Quote:
Originally Posted by AAAAA
You sound like a wonderful young lady and I am very sorry that there are so many changes happening in your life all at once.
Try not to take this the wrong way, but you are FAR too involved in your parent's personal relationship. I fully understand how this affects you, but you are much too informed on things that should remain between your father and your mother. The parent(s) that is including you in this informational loop is doing you a huge disservice. It has changed your relationship with each of your parents permanently, none of this can be "unlearned" and your role in the family has changed dramatically (as you are already seeing by the changes in these relationships).
I know you have everyone's best interest at heart, but the best thing you can do is set up some boundaries. Let your parents know that you don't belong in the middle. Let them know you're concerned and be supportive within your boundaries.
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I completely agree with this!!!! My parents are my PARENTS - it is so not fair for one or the other (or both in your case) to vent their issues with me, what a rough spot to be in. My mom frequently in the past would do that - I finally told her that's what her therapist is for, that I need to be able to respect both of my parents for their roles in my life and not to be burdened with her unhappiness in my dad's behavior and actions and lack of emotional support and on and on. SHE picked him to be her spouse, for better or worse, I on the other hand had no choice in the matter of who would be my father! Being caught in the middle of my parents' drama has been a nightmare and it took moving 2 states away to finally be able to set boundaries that I can live within. It has helped tremendously.