I am feeling a lot better...especially since I have decided to move near family in March. I could go for some IRL mutual support from carefully chosen family members. Reviewed my journals and found that over the past five years, most of the bad stuff in my life has been tied to the county mental health organization. One time I was moving from a shared co-op to my own apartment. The caseworker was suppose to help me with the boxes. Two didn't make it. What was in them? Family and military photo albums, my military awards, letters to from family when I was in the service, every picture of the love of my life I ever owned. No help!