Can't say I've 'overcome' abandonment issues but I do have a thought on that. I'm focusing on being there for myself. I have to remember that others need and expect me to protect my own interests. But instead I automatically let my needs fall away in preference to the expectations and desires of others. It's a part of my upbringing. I was molested at 6 yrs old. I was taught to lie about my injuries to protect the molester who was my grandfather. I was raised to believe that my needs were irrelevant and that it was urgent for me to put them aside.

You should be your first and strongest advocat. It's not selfishness. It's natural to most people. Be there for yourself first. Everyone else is just icing on the cake. Think of things you've done for yourself, to make yourself happier, healthier or just better and be proud of it. Believe that you deserve it. Like joining this forum. This is you taking care of your needs. I hope this helps.