I married my husband because of how he treated his mother, ex-wife, and me. I watched what he did, not what anyone said. What did you know about the kids before she filed? Did he complain about not being able to see them and how much he missed them or did he not mention them? Did he call them or did they call him or did you not know they existed. Did he look forward to "Christmas" or send them cards on their birthdays? What was his relationship that YOU saw before this happened? Believe yourself, what you see and "know".

Too, it could be some combination, something in-between. My husband's ex-wife (she and I are "friends" now) was going on and on one afternoon to me on the phone about how abusive he was. Now, I know she believed what she said and is not a liar but I also know my husband and it probably was not as she perceived and/or presented it. My three stepsons get along well with both of their parents and me and everyone else in the family and everyone gets together often and we all enjoy ourselves.

In a relationship, you have to rely on yourself and your take on things and what matters/doesn't matter to you. I don't know why it bothers you if what she says is true, if you're expecting the perfect man and the divorce and child situation is not his fault. It is both their situation, not made by only one or the other. Even if the ex- is lying, he married that kind of woman, is not wholly blameless for the situation he finds himself in. I would not want full custody of my children, would not want to take them from their father if their father was a "wonderful" father.