I broke my silence for the first time ever this past Monday night. Sine then, I have been having the most god awful nightmares.

Last night, I dreamt I saw my T and then later on, was assaulted by a man from my past. He assauted and choked me till I couldn't breathe. Again, later on, after seeing T again, I was chased by my mother and her friend and held down while water was forced into my throat with a hose. I woke up soaked in my own sweat and gagging.

I hate this.