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Ready to call it quits. Since we have been married for 16 years, I did not consider divorce an option. This marriage had much more positive than negatives overall. However due to a breach of trust and lack of respect, I am moving towards the divorce process.
Recently my husband had a vasectomy as we have two children, don’t want any more and are in our 40s. Less than a week after his procedure, he got rid of his birth control items. I was out of town when he had the procedure and trusted him to take care of the details. Well that was my mistake to trust him. He had not received clearance from the doctor that to have unprotected sex due to t he risk of pregnancy. He never once spoke of this to me.
This weekend I started having back pain and cramps. I assumed my period was starting. On Monday, I began to bleed and clot heavily. I was very confused as it did not feel like a normal period for me.
In the past I have suffered one miscarriage and this seemed similar. My husband’s reaction was to distance himself from me and complain about me being emotional. On a hunch, I went and took a blood test for pregnancy as I was not more than one week late ( my periods are not as regular as in my late 30s) and it was positive. I talked to my husband and got no response from him – dead silence.
In fact, he carried on his day like usual and offered no help to me in anything though I made it clear that I was in physical and emotional pain. When I went to look for the documents he brought home for the urologist, the documents were gone. He stated that he took them to work.
I feel like my value to him is little - he took a chance on my health, health of an unborn child and just went for his own gain. He has never spoken one word about to me. I know that birth control is also my responsibilty and that I am to blame also. But I still feel betrayed by him.
Am I being over emotional or am I reading his cues about his regard for me well?
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