I am sorry you are suffering so much in regard to your relationship and all that happened. I know most of us want to figure out everything and have an answer as *why* people do things that are obviously hurtful to others. I think we can get so caught up in that, we ignore our own needs. We feel bad and betrayed and cannot find solutions or good outcomes.

People have their own demons and we cannot understand it all. It is so frustrating, I know. Personally, I have to disengage and pretend I don't care so much. Caring and giving more to those who don't appreciate it has not paid off in my case. The pain is horrible.

I tend to deal with issues by saying to myself, "they deserve one another." Maybe someday they will answer to their own karma...the best revenge is to live well and take care of yourself. Then surround yourself with healthier people.