I'm going to tell you what I have done in the past to diffuse the anger and frustration that accompanies my breaking points. They are unconventional. I once lost it when I was home alone, tired of everything and feeling helpless to change my situation by myself. I also knew that if anyone was around me, rather than ask for the help I need, since, ostensibly, the people I would be asking it of were in some way contributing to the problem, I would have just lambasted them with a litany of invectives a mile long. I would have done some serious verbal damage. Since I was alone, I grabbed a paper bag and put a bunch of glasses in it, put that paper bag in 2 hefty bags and smashed them to smithereens in my kitchen sink.........now.......before anyone tells me what a crackpot I am, consider that I hurt nobody and gave my anger an audible manifestation that made me feel betterrrrrrr. The sound of breaking glass was soothing to me, the act of breaking that glass was soothing to me...it started off a hateful thing and turned into a catharsis. Ok, and there was no mess either, which was nice. WHEN I had calmed down, took the new trash out, I got my wallet and went to the Salvation Army, got more glasses.......more than I need. There may come a moment when I want to do that again and I'd like to have some uglies on hand to do it with. But in the aftermath, I returned from the store feeling calm. And when I approached people for help it didn't come with unnecessary heaps of blame for my current condition. I usually get all the help I need when I've reached a breaking point but once and only once did someone not choose to be accountable for their role in my being on the edge. It was then a simple matter of me asking them to stay out of my way while I get to a good place. I know that this sounds very unhealthy. But there is merit to separating the actual breakdown from the confrontation that usually occurs. The breakdown can make the confrontation a thing of beauty but not when they occur simultaneously, not in my opinion, not for me anyway. And really, if the objective is to learn how not to get to a breaking point and we miss that somehow, then the plan B is about learning how to cause the least amount of damage, to yourself, to others to your relationships with others.