I've been depressed since my teens, 40+ years ago. One suicide attempt about 4 years ago - pills. Have seen therapists on and off since 17. People in training when I had no money. Later, when I had the bucks - gestalt person, Alice Miller oriented person and other neo-Freudians, transactional, spent 3 years working with Robert Harper an Albert Ellis RETer. Doesn't much matter what they call themselves, the sessions are generally the same - odd, no? Harper did yell at me a few times. Drugs, of course, different cocktails: prozac; zoloft which made me orgasm before I got my pants off; MAO Emsam patch which precipitated suicide attempt; elAvil - I was climbing the walls; lithium; lexapro, wellbutrin and ritilin; currently wellbutrin and cymbalta. Currently seeing a therapist - seems more like coaching than anything else. Tired all the time. Body aches. I keep thinking about Freud's substituting neurotic misery for normal unhappiness, and what my mother said just before she died from cancer, "Is this all there is?" I don't know anyone who seems happy in their marriage. If women fake orgasms, men survive by fake listening and fake sharing. And inventing "legitimate" reasons for being away from the house. Enough of my babbling for now.